What happens before and after the funeral service?

The service itself often lasts only three quarters of an hour, but the day of the funeral is much longer. There is an arrival, a reception, sometimes a last farewell in a small circle, and a gathering afterwards. If you list this in advance, you do not have to think about it on the day itself.

Before the service

Arrival of the family. The close family usually arrives half an hour to an hour earlier. There is time to see the room, look at the flowers and go through the last things with the funeral director.

A last farewell. Some families say goodbye beforehand in private, for example when the coffin is closed.

Checking sound and image. Have the presentation and the music played once on the venue's screen.

Receiving the guests. Guests arrive, sign the condolence book and find a seat. Meanwhile the walk-in music plays and photos are often already shown.

After the service

Carrying out, or the last farewell in the room. With a burial the walk to the grave follows. With a cremation people say goodbye in the room, or the family goes along to the committal.

Condolences and gathering. Usually there is coffee or lunch afterwards, at the venue or elsewhere. Allow three quarters of an hour to an hour and a half.

Wrapping up. The flowers, the condolence book and personal items go home. Agree who does that.

An example of the whole day

For a service at 11:15:

10:30 Family arrives
10:40 Farewell in private
10:55 Test run of sound and image
11:00 Receiving the guests, walk-in
11:15 The service
12:00 Farewell and carrying out
12:15 Coffee and condolences
13:15 End

From arrival to end that is almost three hours, for a service of three quarters of an hour.

Also note who is responsible for each moment. "Take the flowers: John" prevents everyone thinking someone else will do it.

Listing it

In the running order of the day at The Last Farewell you add moments before and after the service: a name and the number of minutes. The running order works out the starting times from the start of the service. The service itself is already there, because it consists of the parts of your presentation. You download the whole as PDF. See a running order for the funeral.

Frequently asked questions

How early should guests be there?

A quarter of an hour before the start is usual. Put the starting time of the service on the card, not the time of the reception.

Does everything have to be right to the minute?

No. The times are a guide. Only the start of the service and the end of the room hire are really fixed.

Does this belong in the order of service too?

No, the order of service covers only the service itself. See order of service for a funeral.